New Year, New Mindset: Why Setting Intentions Instead of Resolutions Creates Lasting Change

Thrive • December 29, 2021

By Thrive Sacramento’s Registered Dietitian Supervisor Kailey Cunningham, MS, RDN, CD

At Thrive, we’re all for self-betterment, but we’re also champions of self-compassion, intuitive approaches, loving yourself as you are, and enjoying the journey — which is why we favor New Year’s intentions over New Year’s resolutions. If you’re hoping to implement personal changes this year, you might want to consider forgoing the rigidity of resolutions and creating intentions rooted in meaning and mindfulness instead. Read on to discover the differences between resolutions and intentions and collect inspiration for your own New Year’s intentions.

THE TROUBLE WITH RESOLUTIONS

Resolutions tend to be influenced by external expectations. They are often harsh and absolute, and fail to acknowledge the intricacies of being human. As such, they generally fail to appreciate steps toward progress that deserve to be rewarded as small successes.

The Harmful Nature of Resolutions to Mental Health 

Akin to a to-do list, resolutions are outcome-driven, narrowly defined, and imply that success or failure are the only possible results. Unlike a to-do list, resolutions typically have perceived high stakes, since they’re meant to be life-changing for the person who attempts to achieve them. With the high stakes of resolutions comes the pressure to be successful, which can actually have a paralyzing rather than inspiring effect. 

Due to their restrictive nature, resolutions can provide individuals with ammunition to engage in negative self-talk, causing them to feel guilty and ashamed — emotions that can impede motivation and be detrimental to mental health. As a result, individuals attempting to follow through with their resolutions may end up experiencing feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, anxiety, and depression.  

THE POWER OF PURPOSEFUL INTENTIONS

Intentions are centered around a person’s values, driving factors, and internal awareness. By honoring an individual’s purpose behind a desired behavior, intentions provide context that allows the person to truly embody the change they’re navigating toward. Additionally, by encouraging a person to reflect on their mental and emotional state, intentions allow individuals to remain flexible as they gently cultivate change.  

In “The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success,” author Deepak Chopra describes intentions as the driving force of desire, saying, “Intent alone is very powerful because intent is desire without attachment to the outcome.” 

In other words, a person’s intentions are not directly attached to their results. Instead, they support practicing patience with oneself, celebrating successes big and small, and appreciating any lessons learned along the way. Intentions allow for nuance, unpredictability, and the non-linear progression often experienced when fostering change. 

How Intentions Nurture Self-Compassion and Lasting Change

Intentions encourage present moment awareness. A person implementing an intention creates space to acknowledge how they feel and adjust their actions accordingly. Typically, the efforts that feel the best and most authentic nurture the desired change. 

For example, the resolution, “I will go to spin class three days a week” leaves no room for flexibility and can paralyze a person with pressure. By shifting the resolution into an intention such as, “I intend to move my body in ways that feel good,” a person has the freedom to explore, experiment, and modify.

Spin class may become a toxic environment due to an unhelpful instructor. An individual may discover that they don’t actually enjoy spinning. Or, one may discover they are not able to afford a gym or studio membership after all. If any of these challenges arise for a person who intends to move their body in ways that feel good, the individual can consider different kinds of movements while still abiding by their intention.

By framing intentions as experiments with the ultimate purpose of discovering what feels good, you can open yourself up to being present and judgment-free while also facilitating sustainable change. The self-compassionate approach of intentions encourages healthy, happy and confident mindsets. 

FOURTEEN INTENTIONS TO INSPIRE SUSTAINABLE CHANGE IN THE NEW YEAR

When considering your intentions for the new year, keep in mind that they are meant to be short, positive and direct, while aligning with your values and remaining open to different possibilities. Below, discover some examples of intentions that we hope inspire your own. 

  1. I intend to be kind to my body and treat it with love.
  2. I intend to nourish myself with adequate food.
  3. I intend to make space in my life for a partner.
  4. I intend to make space for deepening my relationship with my current partner.
  5. I intend to be present with my feelings. 
  6. I intend to love myself and others. 
  7. I intend to find love in everyone.
  8. I intend to prioritize balance both at work and at home.
  9. I intend to be aware of my surroundings. 
  10. I intend to experience my emotions.
  11. I intend to be open to success.
  12. I intend to create space for success.
  13. I intend to invite healing into my life. 
  14. I intend to embrace vulnerability. 

YOU ARE ENOUGH JUST THE WAY YOU ARE

A new year offers an opportunity to adjust elements of our lives that don’t serve us. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep on loving yourself just as you are, celebrating your successes of all sizes, and making the most of teaching moments along the way. If you’re hoping to turn over a new leaf this year and would like professional guidance, feel free to reach out to us to learn more about Thrive’s therapeutic services. 

About the Author

Thrive Sacramento’s Registered Dietitian Supervisor Kailey Cunningham, MS, RDN, CD

Kailey Cunningham, MS, RDN, CD, is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist who obtained a Master’s of Dietetics degree from the University of Kentucky after completing both her undergraduate studies in dietetics and accredited dietetic internship at the same university.

She has been a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist since February of 2013 and has been working in the eating disorder field since 2015. Kailey has experience treating clients at many levels of care, from partial hospitalization programming to outpatient, with a variety of diagnoses including anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, ARFID and OSFED.

She began working at The Emily Program in Lacey, Washington for three years where she acted as the full-time programming dietitian. While in this position, she worked directly with a lead therapist to develop an adolescent treatment track implementing elements of Family-Based Treatment and gaining invaluable experience working with adolescents and their parents. She then worked at Center for Discovery in Tacoma, Washington while building her nutrition counseling private practice. She began her successful practice in April of 2018 and moved it with her from Olympia, Washington to Rocklin, California in October 2020. Kailey is excited to now be a part of the Sacramento Thrive Wellness team providing support for adult and adolescent clients in intensive outpatient and outpatient levels of care.

Kailey’s primary motivator and true passion is supporting others on their journey to a more peaceful and balanced relationship with food and their bodies. Through individualized nutrition counseling and education, she helps those struggling with eating disorder behaviors, body image issues, food aversion and health anxieties find what is right for them while leaving diet culture behind.

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May 15, 2025
Taking steps to protect and maintain good mental health is key to living your best life. Whether it's managing stress, building emotional resilience, or simply finding a moment of peace during your busy day, developing a set of strategies to protect your mental health is essential. This Mental Health Awareness Month is all about turning action into awareness, so why not take action today to care for yourself and improve your mental health? This guide outlines ten impactful activities you can incorporate into your daily routine to boost your mental health starting today. By incorporating these activities into your days, you can take control of your mental health journey, grow personally, and improve your relationship with yourself and others. Why is Taking Action for Your Mental Health Important? Understanding the significance of proactive mental health care can change how we treat ourselves and move through our everyday lives. Taking action for yourself not only improves your overall well-being but also helps prevent existing or potential issues from becoming more severe. When you prioritize your mental health, you’ll feel a greater sense of happiness and productivity, paving the way for stronger relationships and a fuller, more enjoyable life. Focusing on your mental health is not just about problem-solving, but about living in a balanced and fulfilling way that supports your overall well-being and ability to thrive. 10 Effective Activities for Improving Your Mental Health It’s essential to have a repertoire of activities on hand that can boost your mental health. Simple activities like sleeping enough, meditating, spending time with a friend, or seeing a therapist can have huge impacts on your overall mental wellness. Prioritizing your mental health doesn’t have to be complicated or difficult, it’s just about doing activities that make you feel joyful, relaxed, or energized, fueling a better outlook on life overall. Here are 10 activities you can do today to help your brain and body to feel their best: 1. Mindful Practices Practicing mindfulness is a simple yet impactful step you can take in improving and protecting your mental health. Mindfulness practices include activities like meditating and mindful breathing to calm the mind and reconnect with the body. Meditation and breathing exercises are shown to reduce stress, improve focus, and grow your self-awareness. For more breathing exercises for anxiety relief, download our free guide “Breathe Easy” . 2. Eating Intuitively Eating intuitively is a powerful way to boost your energy and mood and reduce stress around food, helping to improve your overall mental health. This approach encourages a healthy relationship with food by promoting balance, variety, and pleasure without guilt. Intuitive eating helps you recognize and respond to your body's signals, leading to more mindful and satisfying eating experiences. By focusing on how foods make you feel, both physically and emotionally, you can make healthier choices that nourish your body and mind. Adequate nutrition has been shown to support brain function, improve mood, and reduce the risk of mental health conditions. 3. Sleep Hygiene Practicing good sleep hygiene is essential for maintaining overall health and wellbeing. Establishing a consistent bedtime routine helps regulate your sleep patterns, ensuring you get the deep sleep your body needs. Aim to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day if possible. Quality sleep is vital for cognitive function, emotional stability, and physical health, making good sleep hygiene a key component of wellness. 4. Mindful Movement Doing movement that you enjoy can have massive impacts on your mental health. Exercise reduces stress by triggering the release of endorphins, which have mood-lifting and pain-relieving effects. It also helps regulate hormones like cortisol, improving the body's ability to handle stress. By simply incorporating enjoyable movement into your routine a few times a week, you’ll see improvements in both your mental and physical health. 5. Go Outside Spending time outside can support physical, mental, and emotional well-being. It allows you to disconnect from everyday stressors, reconnect with the natural world, and experience a sense of tranquility and peace. Spending time in nature has been linked to reduced anxiety, improved mood, and increased mindfulness. Make time to explore outdoor environments such as parks, forests, beaches, or gardens. Practice mindfulness while in nature, focusing on the scenery and sounds that surround you. Incorporating nature into your daily routine can provide a refreshing break from everyday life, improving your mental health. 6. Make Time for Creative Pursuits Creative activities can be a great outlet for self-expression and reducing stress. Creativity allows you to explore new ideas, solve problems, and connect with your inner self. Even dedicating just 10 minutes a day to creative pursuits can have a positive impact on your mental health. Activities like drawing, painting, journaling, or crafting can help you unwind and stimulate your mind. Creative expression can also improve mood, enhance cognitive function, and foster a sense of accomplishment. 7. Practice Positive Self-talk Positive self-talk is a powerful habit that involves speaking to yourself in a kind, supportive, and encouraging manner. It's about cultivating a positive mindset and nurturing self-compassion. By shifting negative thoughts and beliefs to positive affirmations, you can boost your self-esteem and overall well-being. Practice acknowledging your strengths, accomplishments, and perseverance, even in challenging situations. 8. Practice Social Wellness Social wellness is about nurturing meaningful connections with others and fostering a supportive network of relationships. It involves engaging in positive interactions, building trust, and offering and receiving support. Cultivating social wellness contributes to emotional resilience, reduces feelings of isolation, and promotes overall happiness. Take time to connect with friends and family members regularly, whether through phone calls, video chats, or in-person gatherings. 9. Do Something for You Making time for yourself is crucial for maintaining life balance and preventing burnout. This involves setting boundaries, practicing self-care, and prioritizing activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Taking time for yourself allows you to recharge, reflect, and reconnect with your inner needs and desires. Self-care can take many forms, from indulging in a hobby to simply enjoying a quiet moment alone. Regularly dedicating time to yourself helps reduce stress, improve mental clarity, and enhance overall well-being. 10. Visit a Mental Health Professional Sometimes, we need professional support for our mental health, and that’s okay! Knowing when it’s time to see a therapist shows strength and self-awareness. No matter where you are in your mental health journey, getting guidance from a therapist can be a helpful tool in living your best life. Our team of mental health professionals are ready to support you now, don’t be afraid to reach out and open up. When Should I Seek Professional Help for My Mental Health? It's important to know when it's time to reach out to a mental health professional. Persistent feelings of sadness, anxiety, or emotional distress that interfere with your daily life are clear indicators for seeking professional help. If your coping mechanisms and self-care activities fail to alleviate your mental health concerns, reaching out can offer valuable support and interventions. Nurturing Your Mental Well-being Through Action Investing time and effort in your mental health can make positive differences in your everyday life. By understanding the importance of mental health practices and incorporating proactive strategies, you lay the groundwork for feeling better and staying mentally strong over time. Whether through improved sleep hygiene, mindful practices, or seeking professional help when needed, these efforts can bring more joy, emotional stability, and peace into your life. Make these activities a regular part of your day with a focus on self-growth, and you'll be on your way to a healthier mind and a fuller life.
April 28, 2025
Romantic relationships can be one of the most joyful parts of life, but they can also stir up deep fears, especially for those living with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). When OCD takes shape around your relationship, it’s known as Relationship OCD (ROCD), a lesser-known but deeply distressing form of OCD that centers on obsessive fears and doubts about your partner or the relationship itself. Have you ever found yourself spending hours analyzing how you feel, seeking reassurance that your partner is “the one,” or constantly second-guessing whether you’re truly in love? If so, you’re not alone. ROCD is real, and with the right tools and support, healing is possible. Let’s break down what Relationship OCD really looks like, how it affects interactions, and how to find more peace, connection, and presence in your relationship. What is Relationship OCD? Relationship OCD is a subset of obsessive-compulsive disorder that fixates on doubts, fears, or perceived flaws within romantic relationships. Unlike the normal ups and downs that every couple experiences, ROCD involves a preoccupation with intrusive thoughts that feel impossible to stop thinking about, like whether you’re really attracted to your partner, or if they’re “good enough” for you. These thoughts can feel distressing, uncontrollable, and all-consuming. What sets ROCD apart is the compulsive mental checking that follows. You might replay interactions, examine your partner’s every word, or repeatedly ask friends or family members, “Do you think we’re good together?” These rituals, designed to bring relief, often do the opposite. They intensify the anxiety and begin to erode the connection you’re trying to protect. Relationship OCD Examples: What It Can Look Like in Real Life ROCD doesn’t always look the same for everyone. For some, it shows up as intense anxiety about having children with their partner: “What if they’re not going to be a good parent?” For others, it might revolve around analyzing every interaction or feeling jealous of a past relationship their partner had. Here are a few common presentations of ROCD: “Do I love them enough? ” spirals, even when nothing’s wrong. Feeling distressed if your partner doesn’t respond the “right” way during a conversation. Constantly seeking reassurance from others about your relationship. Comparing your partner to idealized versions of relationships you see online. Avoiding important conversations or decisions (like parent-child planning) because of underlying doubts. The key thing to remember? These thoughts are symptoms of OCD, not reflections of reality. How OCD Affects Relationships ROCD can strain even the strongest partnerships. When someone is stuck in a cycle of obsessions and compulsions, it often leads to emotional distance, communication breakdowns, and frustration on both sides. A partner might feel like they’re walking on eggshells or like they’re being constantly evaluated. Meanwhile, the person experiencing ROCD may feel ashamed, misunderstood, or exhausted by their own mind. Many individuals report feeling like they can’t be fully present during time with their partner because their mind is so busy analyzing, comparing, or worrying. And over time, these patterns can impact the health of the relationship itself. That’s why relationship-centered, mental health-informed approaches are so vital. How to Treat Relationship OCD Thankfully, ROCD is treatable. But the most effective treatments don’t just focus on the relationship, they focus on the OCD. At Thrive, our therapists often use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and a specialized approach called Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy (ERP) . These modalities help people face their fears without performing compulsions. Over time, this rewires the brain’s response to uncertainty. Therapists may also incorporate experiential techniques like eye movement desensitization and reprocessing, which engage both the body and mind to help clients process intrusive thoughts and emotional pain. For some, prescription medication like SSRIs may be helpful as part of a treatment plan. For couples navigating ROCD together, couples counseling can support healthy communication and connection without reinforcing compulsions. How to Support a Partner with Relationship OCD If your partner is experiencing ROCD, your role is crucial. It's not about "fixing" them though, it’s about being a safe, steady presence. Here are a few ways to support your partner with ROCD: Educate yourself about OCD and ROCD so you can identify symptoms versus your partner’s true feelings. Avoid reassurance loops . It’s tempting to soothe their fears, but constant reassurance can reinforce the cycle. Encourage professional support with a therapist or psychologist experienced in OCD. Focus on building a relationship where uncertainty is tolerated, not feared. Practice empathy. Remember that these thoughts are distressing and involuntary. With the right tools and support, both of you can learn how to thrive even in the midst of mental health challenges. Final Thoughts: Healing Together ROCD can feel isolating and confusing, but you don’t have to face it alone. Whether you’re the one struggling or the one supporting, healing happens through community, compassion, and the right care. At Thrive Wellness, we believe in compassionate, holistic care, and we’re here to walk alongside you. Whether you need individual therapy, couples counseling, or a dedicated treatment plan, we’re here to help you find your way back to connection, peace, and presence. Need support? Reach out today and begin your journey toward healing together. For tools to help you cope with anxious thoughts, download our free breathing exercises guide "Breathe Easy" .
April 14, 2025
Eating disorders, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) make up a triad of interrelated conditions that often coexist and influence each other in complex ways. While these mental health conditions are challenging on their own, when they co-occur, they can create significant distress and disruptions in daily life. Understanding the intricate relationship between these disorders is crucial for recognizing symptoms and seeking appropriate treatment. In this exploration into the connection between OCD, anxiety, and eating disorders, we aim to shed light on their intertwined nature and provide insights for those seeking knowledge and support. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and Eating Disorders OCD eating disorders are a nuanced blend of obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors centered around food and body image. Those grappling with these disorders experience an overwhelming preoccupation with eating habits, driven by intrusive thoughts that heighten anxiety levels. This anxiety not only exacerbates compulsive eating behaviors but also fuels obsessive thinking. The overlap between anxiety disorders and eating disorders is common, with many displaying symptoms of both conditions concurrently. This overlap suggests a complex connection between these mental health issues, highlighting the need for comprehensive treatment approaches that address all aspects of these disorders together. OCD and Anorexia Nervosa OCD and anorexia nervosa often co-occur, creating a dual struggle for those affected. People with both conditions experience overlapping symptoms such as intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors. This dual presentation can make diagnosis and treatment more challenging. A desire for control often drives both OCD and anorexia, leading to rigid routines, rituals, and restriction surrounding food and body image that can be difficult to break. Understanding the shared behaviors and motivations between these disorders can aid mental health professionals in developing more effective therapeutic strategies tailored to their clients’ specific needs. OCD and ARFID OCD and Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) share a common thread, deeply influencing anxiety levels and eating patterns. Individuals with OCD might develop rituals or compulsions around food intake motivated by distressing thoughts, mirroring the restrictive behaviors and fear characteristic of ARFID. Both disorders are driven by a strong need for control and intense fear, significantly affecting one's nutritional intake and overall well-being. The parallels between OCD and ARFID suggest that effective treatment involves addressing the underlying anxiety, fears, and aversions that contribute to both conditions. OCD And Bulimia The relationship between OCD and bulimia presents with unique challenges that offer insight into compulsive behaviors and intrusive thoughts. The co-occurrence of OCD and bulimia can look like compulsive binge-purge cycles rooted in an attempt to fight distressing thoughts about food and body image. Both disorders can act as coping mechanisms for underlying anxiety and distress, often manifesting as a means to gain control. The co-occurrence of OCD and bulimia complicates diagnosis and treatment, requiring a comprehensive therapeutic approach that addresses both sides of the disorder. OCD and OSFED OCD and other specified eating and feeding disorders (OSFED) often co-exist, each one potentially exacerbating the other. Both disorders frequently involve intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors, such as ritualistic eating or compulsive exercising. Anxiety emerges as a common underlying factor, fuelling obsessive fears and the need for control over food and body image. Treatment approaches for these conditions often overlap, particularly with interventions such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) that aim to address distorted thinking patterns. This overlap suggests that a holistic approach to treatment can be especially beneficial for those affected by both OCD and eating disorders. Shared Traits of OCD and Disordered Eating Ritualistic Behavior Ritualistic behaviors are commonly observed in those coping with OCD, anxiety, and eating disorders. These behaviors serve a purpose: to manage distress and create an illusion of control. Though these repetitive actions might reduce anxiety temporarily, they can become time-consuming, disruptive, and negatively impact your quality of life. In OCD, people perform rituals to alleviate obsessive thoughts, whereas, in eating disorders, these rituals revolve primarily around food and body image. Anxiety Anxiety is a prominent mental health condition characterized by feelings of worry, fear, or unease that can significantly affect daily life. It often coexists with OCD and eating disorders, creating a complex interplay of symptoms. Anxiety exacerbates the compulsions and obsessions seen in OCD, leading to heightened stress and increased distress. Perfectionism Perfectionism connects OCD, anxiety, and eating disorders, driving people to pursue unrealistic standards. This pursuit of perfection often leads to increased anxiety, as the fear of failing to meet expectations results in constant worry and stress. In OCD, perfectionism manifests through repetitive behaviors aimed at achieving flawlessness and control. Understanding the role of perfectionism in these disorders can be pivotal in formulating effective therapeutic interventions tailored to combat these perfectionistic tendencies. Differences Between Disordered Eating and OCD Disordered eating involves irregular eating behaviors often linked to concerns about weight or body shape, while OCD is characterized by intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors or mental acts. Although both conditions may involve anxiety and compulsive behaviors, their motivations and manifestations differ significantly. Disordered eating focuses primarily on food-related issues, whereas OCD encompasses a wide array of obsessions frequently unrelated to food. Understanding these differences helps in tailoring more targeted treatment options for people struggling with either or both conditions. Finding Help for Eating Disorders and OCD Seeking professional help is crucial for those dealing with anorexia and OCD, given the complex interplay of these disorders. Consulting therapists or counselors specializing in eating disorders can provide valuable insights and guidance. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective treatment option for modifying maladaptive thought patterns and behaviors. Additionally, joining support groups or online communities provides a sense of connection and shared coping strategies. Ensuring a comprehensive treatment plan that includes medical, nutritional, and psychological components is vital for addressing all aspects of the disorders. Moreover, involving family members or loved ones in the recovery process provides additional support and understanding and prevents accommodating behaviors in the home. Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) is widely considered the gold standard treatment for OCD and can be a critical component in addressing co-morbid presentations of OCD and eating disorders. ERP is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy that involves the systematic and gradual exposure to feared stimuli while preventing the accompanying compulsive response. In the context of OCD/ED's, ERP helps reduce distress associated with intrusive thoughts related to food, body image, and rituals around eating. Research has shown that ERP can significantly improve nutritional intake by increasing an individual's flexibility with food choices, reducing avoidance behaviors, and supporting eating in a variety of settings and contexts. Do You Have a Loved One Battling an Eating Disorder or OCD? Understanding the intricate link between eating disorders, anxiety, and OCD can help improve the support offered to a loved one struggling with these challenges. Recognizing common characteristics and behaviors associated with these disorders further aids in building empathy and effective communication. Education on the psychological and physical aspects of eating disorders is essential for offering informed assistance and encouragement. Assisting your loved one in gaining professional help and maintaining patience are crucial steps in supporting a loved one on their journey to recovery. To learn more about eating disorders, download our free eating disorder guide “Recovery is Real” . Embracing Understanding and Support The intersection of anxiety, OCD, and eating disorders illustrates the complex nature of mental health challenges. By learning more about these interconnected conditions, those struggling and their loved ones can gain greater understanding and uncover effective pathways toward healing. Providing holistic support centered on empathy, education, and appropriate intervention not only improves treatment outcomes but also nurtures strength and resilience in the face of challenges. Through dedicated effort, recovery can be possible for anyone and can allow them to live a full life.
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