Six Ways Parents Can Promote Body Positivity and Food Neutrality in Children

Thrive • June 9, 2022

By Thrive Wellness Sacramento Director of Child & Adolescent Services Alexis Nicodemus, AMFT, APCC

Facing potential exposure to misleading food and body messages at such impressionable ages, children are at risk of developing misconstrued ideas about food and their bodies. Parents can combat such harmful cultural conditioning by creating a foundation of body positivity and food neutrality at home. Here’s how:

1. Appreciate the ways the body helps us accomplish all elements of life. 

To instill body positivity at a young age, parents can guide their children in expressing gratitude for the body and all its amazing capabilities. The practice can be as simple as encouraging children to acknowledge and appreciate their toes for helping them stand. By emphasizing the function of different body parts, any focus on physical appearance can be transcended by parents’ and children’s admiration for the purposeful dynamism of the body. 

2. Refrain from remarks about appearances.

Comments on appearances, whether positive or negative, can be triggering for adults and children alike. Placing undue meaning on how someone looks dismisses the precious value of their authentic self. Parents can emphasize the inner worth that all humans possess by outwardly appreciating individuals on a holistic level, instead of using surface-level comments to describe appearances. That way, children can learn to derive their sense of identity from deeper elements of their being, such as their character, values, and inherent dignity. 

3. Ensure children wear clothes that fit their current developmental state. 

As children mature and their bodies change, they may feel uncomfortable in their own skin at times. Wearing clothes that fit their current developmental state can help children adapt to their growing and developing bodies and encourage self-confidence

4. Limit, monitor, and help curate children’s social media use. 

Research points to a link between mental health concerns and social media use. For youths, the breadth of content on social media can be confusing, unrealistic, and even harmful. Bullying and unfair comparison to others are also prevalent risks for youths using social media. Due to these dangers, parents may consider limiting their children’s social media use. 

If they do permit their children to use social media, parents may find it beneficial to monitor the content their children are exposed to while also curating their feed. Parents may choose to include inspiring, enriching, and encouraging social media content for their children to view. Such content might include body appreciation posts that embrace natural appearances, instead of images that are overly edited to align with skewed cultural standards of beauty. 

5. Embrace food neutrality.

Largely due to the diet industry’s influence , many perceive foods as either “healthy” or “unhealthy.” Because food is often closely associated with body image, contorting the quality of foods as either “good” or “bad” can harm individuals’ relationships with both food and their bodies and even lead to disordered eating behaviors

Contrary to societal standards, all foods are equal as they help keep us alive by fueling our bodies. In order to combat dangerous cultural messaging, families should treat all foods the same while also emphasizing food’s role in being the source of vital energy. Parents should encourage and empower their children to trust their own bodies’ internal signals to let them know when, what, and how much to eat. 

Additionally, it may be helpful for families to approach nourishment using the ABC’s of nutrition:

  • Adequacy: Eating adequately helps provide the body and brain with the necessary energy to function properly.
  • Balance: Incorporating a balance of various types of foods in each food group can help ensure the intake of an appropriate array of nutrients. 
  • Choice: Exercising personal choice in all decisions about eating can transcend any misinformation about the moral values of different foods or other misleading information about nutrition. 

Parents should also stray away from conversations about dieting, as dieting behavior can interfere with one’s ability to listen to their own natural hunger and fullness cues . Instead, parents should remain impartial when speaking about food and take opportunities to reinforce food’s ability to evoke nourishing, cathartic, and social experiences.

6. When possible, eat together as a family. 

Making time for family meals can promote mental well-being for parents and children. At the table, family members can learn more about each other, connect with one another, and give each other undivided attention, all while nourishing themselves and enriching the entire relationship of the family. 

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While parents can do their absolute best to foster healthy associations with food and the body in their children, sometimes there may be deeper mental and behavioral health conditions at root that result in disordered eating behaviors or diagnosed eating disorders. These serious health concerns require professional guidance for lasting recovery. If your child is struggling with body image or food-related concerns, our multidisciplinary team of psychiatrists, therapists,  dietitians, and more can provide compassionate, clinical care that guides your loved one towards a more accepting, intuitive, and confident relationship with food and their body. Reach out to learn more about our outpatient therapy and eating disorder treatment services .  

About the Author

Thrive Wellness Sacramento Director of Child & Adolescent Services Alexis Nicodemus, AMFT, APCC

Alexis Nicodemus earned a bachelor’s degree in early childhood education with a minor in counseling as well as a master’s degree in counseling from Sacramento State University in California. Her clinical experience includes working in intensive outpatient programs as well as residential facilities for eating disorder recovery. As the director of child and adolescent services at Thrive Wellness Sacramento, Alexis helps to ensure that program curriculum is properly implemented, works to collect collateral contacts as needed to support treatment, and offers therapeutic services to clients experiencing eating disorders and co-existing conditions.

As a clinical therapist, Alexis employs modalities such as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness practices to support clients struggling with mental and behavioral health concerns. Her passion is to assist individuals in the ways they most need in order to find joy, hope, and purpose along the path to healing. Alexis wants clients to know that while life inevitably presents challenges, they are not alone in facing them and there is always light at the end of the tunnel. She strongly promotes the importance of mental health, emphasizes that each of us matters, and advocates for seeking assistance when one’s well-being depends on it.

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When Emma was 8, her parents noticed her food choices shrinking. At first, they assumed it was just picky eating — “She’ll outgrow it,” friends said. But by 10, Emma would only eat crackers, cheese, and chicken nuggets. Family dinners became nightly struggles, her growth slowed, and she skipped birthday parties to avoid “strange food.” Her parents felt powerless, her brother grew frustrated, and outings dwindled. What began as food avoidance soon reshaped the rhythm of the entire household. When children avoid food, most parents expect it’s a passing stage. But when restriction deepens, shrinks to only a few “safe foods,” and begins affecting growth or health, families suddenly find themselves in unfamiliar territory. This is often where Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) emerges — with effects that extend far beyond the plate. As providers, we need to be attuned to these patterns. It’s tempting to dismiss them as “no big deal,” yet for many families, they are life-altering. Sadly, Emma’s story is not unusual. Mealtimes as Battlegrounds Families living with ARFID often describe mealtimes as emotionally charged, exhausting, and unpredictable. What should be a chance to connect around the table can feel more like a negotiation or even a standoff. Parents wrestle with whether to push their child to try a new food or give in to the same “safe foods” again and again to avoid tears, gagging, or complete meltdowns. This ongoing tension can make mealtimes dreaded rather than cherished. Siblings, too, are affected. Some may feel resentful when family meals are limited to what only one child will tolerate. Others may act out in response to the constant attention the child with ARFID receives. Over time, the dinner table shifts from a place of nourishment and bonding into a stage for conflict, anxiety, and guilt — a pattern that can erode family cohesion and resilience. Social Isolation and Missed Experiences ARFID impacts more than what happens at home; it influences how families engage with the world around them. Everyday events — birthday parties, school lunches, vacations, even extended family dinners — become sources of stress. Parents may pack special foods to avoid confrontation or, in many cases, decline invitations altogether to protect their child from embarrassment or overwhelm. This avoidance can lead to an unintended consequence: isolation. Families miss out on milestones, friendships, and traditions because of the unpredictability surrounding food. The child may feel left out or ashamed, while parents grieve the loss of “normal” family experiences. This social withdrawal can compound the anxiety already present in ARFID and deepen its impact across generations. Emotional Toll on Parents The emotional strain on parents navigating ARFID is significant. Many describe living in a constant state of worry — Will my child get enough nutrients? Will they ever grow out of this? Am I doing something wrong? This worry often spirals into guilt and self-blame, particularly when outside voices dismiss the disorder as mere “picky eating.” In addition, the pressure to “fix” mealtimes can strain marital relationships, creating disagreements over discipline, feeding strategies, or medical decisions. Parents may also feel emotionally depleted, pouring all their energy into managing one child’s needs while inadvertently neglecting themselves or their other children. Without support, this chronic stress can lead to burnout, depression, and disconnection within the family system. The Role of Providers For clinicians, ARFID must be viewed not only as an individual diagnosis but as a family-wide challenge. Effective care requires attention to both the clinical symptoms and the family dynamics that shape recovery. Parent Support: Educating caregivers that ARFID is not their fault, offering psychoeducation, and helping them reframe mealtime struggles as part of the disorder — not a parenting failure. Family-Based Interventions: Coaching families in structured meal support, communication strategies, and gradual exposure work so parents don’t feel powerless. Holistic Care: Involving therapists, dietitians, occupational therapists, and medical providers ensures that the family does not shoulder the weight of treatment alone. When families are validated, supported, and given practical tools, the entire household can begin to heal. Treatment is not only about expanding a child’s food repertoire but also about restoring peace, resilience, and connection at home. Moving Forward ARFID may begin with one individual, but its ripple effects are felt across the entire family system. By addressing both the psychological and relational dimensions, providers can help transform mealtimes from a source of conflict into an opportunity for healing and connection. For those who want to go deeper, we invite you to join our upcoming training on ARFID , where we will explore practical strategies for supporting both clients and their families.
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