Four Ways To Care For a Partner Struggling With Mental or Behavioral Health

Thrive • February 14, 2022

By Thrive Waco’s Coordinator of Clinical Services Brooke Hill-Allen, Ph.D., LPC-S, LMFT, NCC, BC-TMH

A mental or behavioral health condition can overwhelm a partner as they struggle to understand their significant other’s diagnosis, support them through their healing, and cope with their own emotions. Although recovery can be challenging , the couple may embrace the journey as an opportunity to grow stronger individually and within their relationship. Below, discover strategies for caring for a partner with a mental or behavioral health concern. 

1. LISTEN TO YOUR LOVED ONE.

Mental and behavioral health conditions affect individuals differently, varying in severity and symptoms. By listening to your significant other describe their mental or behavioral health experience, you show your partner that you care enough to attempt to comprehend their challenges. With a greater grasp of their struggle, you’re also more inclined to encourage their recovery. 

2. NURTURE YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

Mental and behavioral health concerns can feel all-consuming for the affected person and their significant other. To maintain the health of their relationship , partners should engage in open communication and spend quality time together. As they nurture their relationship, couples are less likely to blame relationship challenges on a partner’s mental or behavioral health condition, and are more likely to strengthen their bond as they work toward healing together.

3. CARE FOR YOURSELF.

While helping your significant other who’s struggling with their mental or behavioral health, your own self-care habits may slip. By prioritizing your self-care , you can be a better caregiver for your significant other. So, be sure to carve out time to eat adequately and consistently , maintain good sleep hygiene , engage in mindful movement , and invest in your own interests. 

4. SEEK THERAPEUTIC SUPPORT INDIVIDUALLY OR AS A COUPLE.

Attending therapy can impart insight into your significant other’s mental or behavioral health condition, while also equipping you with strategies to help foster their healing. You may also consider joining a support group for loved ones of individuals with a mental or behavioral health condition. Additionally, couples therapy can grant expert guidance as partners navigate a mental or behavioral health condition within the relationship. 

MENTAL AND BEHAVIORAL HEALTH SUPPORT AT THRIVE 

From anxiety and depression to eating disorders and perinatal mental health conditions , Thrive offers integrated treatment for mental and behavioral health conditions as well as individual and couples therapy. Contact us to learn more. 

About the Author

Thrive Waco’s Coordinator of Clinical Services Brooke Hill-Allen, Ph.D., LPC-S, LMFT, NCC, BC-TMH

​​Dr. Hill-Allen is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Supervisor (LPC-S) in Texas and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in Washington as well as an AAMFT Board Approved Supervisor with more than a decade of clinical experience. She has had the privilege of working in many multidisciplinary teams in several different therapeutic settings including community agencies, university counseling centers, and private practice. Dr. Hill-Allen’s theoretical approach is eclectic, meaning she incorporates multiple therapeutic styles such as Person-Centered Therapy and Family Systems. Because life can be uncertain and flexibility is important for providing treatment, Dr. Hill-Allen is also a Board Certified TeleMental Health Provider.

Dr. Hill-Allen holds a doctorate in marriage and family therapy from Texas Tech University, a master’s degree in counseling from the University of Houston–Victoria, and a bachelor’s degree in sociology and social work from Baylor University. Dr. Hill-Allen has a wealth of experience working with clients from a variety of different backgrounds as well as a wide variety of presenting concerns.

As the coordinator of clinical services at Thrive Wellness Waco, Dr. Hill-Allen is passionate about providing an environment that fosters safety and growth while also offering equitable and accessible multicultural mental health services to the BIPOC community.

Brooke is a Texas native and in her free time enjoys family time with her husband and son.

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When Emma was 8, her parents noticed her food choices shrinking. At first, they assumed it was just picky eating — “She’ll outgrow it,” friends said. But by 10, Emma would only eat crackers, cheese, and chicken nuggets. Family dinners became nightly struggles, her growth slowed, and she skipped birthday parties to avoid “strange food.” Her parents felt powerless, her brother grew frustrated, and outings dwindled. What began as food avoidance soon reshaped the rhythm of the entire household. When children avoid food, most parents expect it’s a passing stage. But when restriction deepens, shrinks to only a few “safe foods,” and begins affecting growth or health, families suddenly find themselves in unfamiliar territory. This is often where Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID) emerges — with effects that extend far beyond the plate. As providers, we need to be attuned to these patterns. It’s tempting to dismiss them as “no big deal,” yet for many families, they are life-altering. Sadly, Emma’s story is not unusual. Mealtimes as Battlegrounds Families living with ARFID often describe mealtimes as emotionally charged, exhausting, and unpredictable. What should be a chance to connect around the table can feel more like a negotiation or even a standoff. Parents wrestle with whether to push their child to try a new food or give in to the same “safe foods” again and again to avoid tears, gagging, or complete meltdowns. This ongoing tension can make mealtimes dreaded rather than cherished. Siblings, too, are affected. Some may feel resentful when family meals are limited to what only one child will tolerate. Others may act out in response to the constant attention the child with ARFID receives. Over time, the dinner table shifts from a place of nourishment and bonding into a stage for conflict, anxiety, and guilt — a pattern that can erode family cohesion and resilience. Social Isolation and Missed Experiences ARFID impacts more than what happens at home; it influences how families engage with the world around them. Everyday events — birthday parties, school lunches, vacations, even extended family dinners — become sources of stress. Parents may pack special foods to avoid confrontation or, in many cases, decline invitations altogether to protect their child from embarrassment or overwhelm. This avoidance can lead to an unintended consequence: isolation. Families miss out on milestones, friendships, and traditions because of the unpredictability surrounding food. The child may feel left out or ashamed, while parents grieve the loss of “normal” family experiences. This social withdrawal can compound the anxiety already present in ARFID and deepen its impact across generations. Emotional Toll on Parents The emotional strain on parents navigating ARFID is significant. Many describe living in a constant state of worry — Will my child get enough nutrients? Will they ever grow out of this? Am I doing something wrong? This worry often spirals into guilt and self-blame, particularly when outside voices dismiss the disorder as mere “picky eating.” In addition, the pressure to “fix” mealtimes can strain marital relationships, creating disagreements over discipline, feeding strategies, or medical decisions. Parents may also feel emotionally depleted, pouring all their energy into managing one child’s needs while inadvertently neglecting themselves or their other children. Without support, this chronic stress can lead to burnout, depression, and disconnection within the family system. The Role of Providers For clinicians, ARFID must be viewed not only as an individual diagnosis but as a family-wide challenge. Effective care requires attention to both the clinical symptoms and the family dynamics that shape recovery. Parent Support: Educating caregivers that ARFID is not their fault, offering psychoeducation, and helping them reframe mealtime struggles as part of the disorder — not a parenting failure. Family-Based Interventions: Coaching families in structured meal support, communication strategies, and gradual exposure work so parents don’t feel powerless. Holistic Care: Involving therapists, dietitians, occupational therapists, and medical providers ensures that the family does not shoulder the weight of treatment alone. When families are validated, supported, and given practical tools, the entire household can begin to heal. Treatment is not only about expanding a child’s food repertoire but also about restoring peace, resilience, and connection at home. Moving Forward ARFID may begin with one individual, but its ripple effects are felt across the entire family system. By addressing both the psychological and relational dimensions, providers can help transform mealtimes from a source of conflict into an opportunity for healing and connection. For those who want to go deeper, we invite you to join our upcoming training on ARFID , where we will explore practical strategies for supporting both clients and their families.
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